Home › Magazine › Summer 2006 › What's the Opposite of Jealousy?
Filed in Family, Relationships

What's the Opposite of Jealousy?

Jorge N. Ferrer questions the Buddhist allegiance to monogamy.

Jorge N. Ferrer

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jealousyBUDDHIST TRADITION SPEAKS of four "divine abodes," or qualities of an awakened mind to be cultivated and put into practice. Also called the “four immeasurables,” these states—lovingkindness (maitri), compassion (karuna), sympathetic joy (mudita), and equanimity (upeksha)—are to be aroused and radiated outward by the practitioner, without limit or exclusion. Of these, mudita is for many Westerners the least familiar, at least as a term. It refers to the capacity to participate in the joy of others, to take happiness in the happiness of others. Though practice aims ultimately to develop sympathetic joy for all beings, intimate relationships offer everyone—whether Buddhist or not—a precious opportunity to taste its experiential flavor. When we are in love, the joy of our beloved becomes extremely contagious.

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