Looking For My Life

A Zen student ventures into the thorny thicket of anxiety.

Scott Genmyo Miller

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For the past month the residents of Great Vow Zen Monastery and the wider sangha have taken on the practice of looking at anxiety in our lives. We’ve started to look at when it arises, what shape it takes, and how we manage when it is present. We’ve also been looking at how long that thread (although actually it’s more like a dense chord or rope—I’m imagining jute rope or telephone wire) has been sewn into the fabric of our lives. I’m learning that anxiety and fear are almost always present throughout my days and nights. They are a subtle spice that flavors my dreams and breathes thick musk-filled air into the world while I snore at night.

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