Seven Tips for Giving Up Gossip September 21, 2009
Posted by Philip Ryan in : Buddhism, Buddhist Teachings, Tibetan Buddhism , trackback
by 1. Recognize that gossip doesn’t undo the situation you’re talking about. It only puts in motion another situation based on negative feelings.
2. Know that comparing yourself to others is useless. Everyone has his or her own talents. In this way, give up jealousy and the wish to put others down.
3. Be aware of and transform your own thoughts, words, and deeds rather than commenting on those of others.
4. Train your mind to see others’ positive qualities and discuss them. This will make you much happier than gossiping ever could.
5. Forgive, knowing that people do harmful things because they are unhappy. If you don’t make someone into an enemy, you won’t want to gossip about him.
6. Have a sense of humor about what you think, say, and do, and be able to laugh at all of the silly things we sentient beings carry out in our attempt to be happy. If you see the humor in our human predicament, you’ll be more patient.
7. Practice saying something kind to someone every day. Do this especially with people you don’t like. It gets easier with practice and bears surprisingly good results.
(from Bhikshuni Thubten Chodron’s “The Truth About Gossip,” Tricycle, Summer 2006 )
Comments»
Thank you, this is one of my toughest struggles and these are very clear and helpful tips to practice everyday.
Thanks! I’m going to print this list out and post it on the wall.
Thank you.
om mani padme hum
Thank you! This is an ongoing struggle for me. Your tips will be very helpful.
I hate gossip! I’ve been the victim of it many times and it hurts!! I do my best not to gossip, although I’ve slipped occasionally….
great Thanks
thank you. i needed the reminder…
thank you and this is one to print out and share with others. Now, how to respond to someone who is always making gossip-y comments about a mutually known person? I have some responses that I use. Any other suggestions?
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[...] Chodron’s article, “The Truth About Gossip,” (from which we drew the “Seven Tips for Giving Up Gossip,”) we received a lot of mail, but one of the most interesting was the cartoon (one panel of [...]
yesterday, i found that my coworker was gossiping about me with my boss. this person was saying evil things about me, things that were distorted, things that make me look bad to my boss. i realize now that this person is unhappy and jealous. i wanted to retaliate by telling my other coworkers bad things about this person, but i have read your post, and it has helped me see the reality of the situation.
thank you.
I have an issue if someone is telling lies about me. If I do not explain the truth, a weak minded person may believe the lies. I think I should tell the truth so the lie will dissapear.
amazing. Thanks, Lama.
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Great Topic for Women Group Discussion. Thanks